Adventures in Grocery Shopping

When I was a kid I used to love the grocery store. I wanted everything in it. I wanted to try to cook everything in it. I used to want to go through the produce section and know what every kind of fruit and vegetable was. My favorite aisle was the spices - I wanted to read about every one. I sort of felt like I was this special genius chef child and my mother was lucky to have me.

Holy crap this 14 year old kid is a 5 star chef. He started learning because he hated his mother's cooking. My retroactive jealously gears are in hyper-drive. #Couldabeenme

When I became an adult, my mother told me how after epic 2 hour trips to the grocery store with me she'd sometimes finish buckling me in, shut the minivan door, and fantasize about maybe just not getting back in the car....

I like to think it was because she was too embarrassed to be seen in that lame ass van...

Then I got older and go could to store by myself and it'd be awesome because I could take my time looking at all the awesome ingredients and come up with all kinds of recipe ideas. I just couldn't buy any of it because I was a poor broke undergrad.

Yeah, you're going to need to scale that sirloin and potatoes au gratin down to hotdogs and mac 'n cheese.

Three Cheese Lasagna

The best part about this recipe is that it makes one for now and one for later!

Lasagna is one of those foods that can look kind of intimidating because of all the layers and ingredients. But really its a simple dish to put together once you know how! Also, it freezes well and makes for great leftovers. It is also a fantastic dish to make for a friend who just had a baby!

She just made a human. She shouldn't have to make dinner.

The Worst Pick Up Ever

Once upon a time I was in law school and I wasn't happily married. During this period I would often go out to study at Starbucks or occasionally Barnes and Noble.

I don't study without coffee. I have standards. Actually, I'm not sure I do much of anything without coffee...

And from time to time in those single days I'd get picked up. Most were completely forgettable, but one, one stands out in a blaze of awful glory.

See, I was a single mom back in those law school days and so full evenings out to go study at one of my favorite places, Barnes and Noble, were few and far between. But this night one of my best friends offered to man the fort (or man the Lulu) while I tried to catch up.

I had picked Barnes and Noble because in the old days they didn't have internet. And no internet means more studying.

Because I know all I'd do is check Facebook, CNN, and eBay

July Challenge Day 13: And This is Why I'm Fat

There is a website called This Is Why You're Fat. If you haven't seen it - you should check it out. It is an orgy of food that is practically preparing the first degree murder of your arteries.

This is a Cronut. A croissant donut. It makes me ashamed, but I'd probably eat that.

A lot of the foods on there are things made by depraved calorie hoarding individuals at home

A bacon mug filled with cheddar. Perhaps..too much bacon? I think I just blasphemed

Making Martha: Ginger Chicken Stir Fry

This was devoured in probably under 20 minutes...

So while this recipe technically falls under 'Making Martha' as it is from one of her cookbooks, it's actually one of the few recipes that doesn't leave out vital steps or assume the home cook had, say, about 2 years in an elite French cooking academie. But that might be because this is from the editors of Martha Stewart Living (read: minions) and so is for us neophytes...

All that being said - its flipping delicious. I was straight up surprised at how yummy this dish is. And so with no further ado here is my take on this dish. (Obviously this is not wholly my recipe but I did add all the detailed steps I used)

15 Life Lessons as Learned from my 6 Year Old Girl

Everyone on Facebook/the Internet/ Chicken Soup for the Soul Vol. 349 has heard stories of little children in their wisdom and innocence (isn't that kind of a contradiction in terms) teaching adults valuable life lessons.

"For you see Mother, when we divest ourselves of our needless Earthly worries we can ascend and achieve Zen"

The author Paulo Coelho (who I actually really like and own most of his books) said "A child can teach an adult three things: to be happy for no reason, to always be busy with something, and to know how to demand with all his might that which he desires.”

And while he's not wrong, and kids are totally awesome, they are the same tiny critters we always seem to be telling 'no' to...(and mostly with just cause)

No Isabella, drawing on Sissy is not Zen. It is not Zen at all.

So after reading the story of the child who asked his dad for $100 to buy an hour of his time being posted for maybe the zillionth time on Facebook this afternoon (not hating on you for posting it by the by, it's a cute story) I decided to compile my own list of lessons learned from observing the fabulous Lulu.


1. More is More...and Even More is Even Better

Whoever said "less is more" was smoking something. Whether its glitter or Hershey's kisses or mud on your shoes or ammo in your nerf gun, more is better. An art project is not complete while there are still supplies available for gluing and the piece has not exceeded its tensile strength.  You cannot wear too many necklaces or too much lipstick. There is no such thing as 'too much fun' and the Berenstain Bears "Too Much Birthday" is a complete fabrication.

See this? This here is not even nearly enough eye shadow. You can clearly still see my cheeks.

2. The Best Way to Make Sure You Match is to Wear Only One Print

Remember how I said more is more? This totally applies to outfits. In the morning your mom might tell you your clothes don't match - get around this by say, wearing all yellow. It matches if it's all the same color or print. Stands to reason.

Why oh why didn't I put on my cheetah shoes?

Semi From Scratch Chicken Teriyaki

We eat this dish a lot around here

I love LOVE LOVE takeout. Only its kind of bad for you. And it gets very expensive. So I'd been trying to learn to make homemade Asian take out for quite awhile now. I still have loads to learn but I have managed to make some delicious Teriyaki.

Its semi from scratch because I do use pre-made Teriyaki sauce as my base - eventually I'm going to upgrade to totally from scratch, but this will do for now.

However, even more than the sauce, the technique is important. Its all about cooking the chicken fast and getting that perfect serving of fluffy white rice. I've made this recipe about a dozen times and it has yet to fail me.

Make sure you read through the instructions carefully BEFORE you cook though - it's all about how you cook your meat!